What is the date you began writing this memoir and the date when you completed the memoir? I began writing this book in 2018 on my own. Then decided to do a he said/she said type of writing so for a year my husband and I have been co-writing the memoir together. I hope to have it completed and ready to publish by September or October.
Where did you do most of your writing for this memoir? And please describe in detail. I do all my writing at my dining room table. I am currently taking care of my 90-year-old father-in-law. He spends all his time in the living room but likes to know I am there, so I moved my office into the dining room so he can see me, and I can still write.
What were your writing habits while writing this memoir- did you drink something as you wrote, listen to music, write in pen and paper, directly on laptop, specific time of day? I do not have any habits while writing. Since it’s mine and my husband’s story, It just flowed. But when we started editing, I would print it all out, edit it on paper and retype it into my laptop. I like to do my writing early in the AM while my mind is fresh. Editing with my husband comes in the afternoons on the weekends when he has time.
Out of all the specific memories you write about in this memoir, which ONE MEMORY was the most emotional for you to write about? And can you share that specific excerpt with us here. The excerpt can be as short or as long as you prefer, and please provide page numbers as reference. The one piece in the whole book that was the most emotional was the one short chapter I wrote on what it was like to be married to a meth addict.
It would be too long to put here, but here is a small portion:
The meth had made Sal extremely sexual, aggressive, and it removed the love from his heart that he once had for his family, for me. To be honest, he started treating me more like a whore instead of his wife. I felt dirty, yet I continued to enable him and allowed him to make me the woman I was becoming, the kind of woman he molded me to be. At times, I felt as if I was going through his addiction with him, except he was the only one having fun. I had so many mixed emotions but most of the things I did, I did just to avoid confrontation.
Can you describe the step-by-step process of writing about this ONE MEMORY? With this particular memory, there was no step by step. My feelings flowed in this chapter, and I only had to edit some grammar. After I wrote it this chapter, I read it to my husband, and he cried.
My husband had written a portion for the book called What it was like to be a Meth Addict. It was so good! It made a non-addict feel what it felt like to be an addict. I was sitting at my dinner table on my laptop editing our book when it occurred to me that I should write something about being married to a meth addict so that the addict reading our story or someone who had never been in my place can understand what me, as a wife of an addict went through. I started typing and the words just kept coming. My eyes begin to well up with tears as I was remembering how I felt going through my husband’s addiction. How it didn’t just change the person using, but it changed me. He made me a bitter, angry woman, and a woman, excuse the bluntness, who opened her legs to all those he brought home for me to have sex with.
It took me about 20 minutes to write this portion. The words and the feelings of what I experienced were fresh in my mind. When I was done typing this chapter, I read it to my husband who began to cry. He didn’t realize what it felt like to be on the other side. Addiction is not just about the addict, it’s about those around you as well. It affects all of us!
Were there any deletions from this excerpt that you can share with us? I wrote it all from my memory and my heart. Everything I said I kept.
http://breakingthechainsofsin.com/
